What will Ben be leaving this summer when he returns to the still unknown future of adult services back here in Illinois? Why is it hard to think about, and maintain dry eyes? Why don’t I even feel like writing about any of this?

As we were about to head back to Chicago Sunday, with Ben still in his massive cast, Karen was feeling really down, having been there for two weeks.

"He'll be ok,” one his staff (such a sterile word) told us. “He's our baby too, you know."

See???

OK, if that statement is distasteful or seems infantilizing to you, please move along. It means you don’t know Ben. Period. His big smile when we say he’s “Mommy’s baby, and Daddy’s baby too,” tells us his opinion, the only one that matters. Period. Like it or not, in the most essential ways, he is our eternal toddler. Take offence at our term only if you are generically offended by toddlers.

And his staff at Monarch are his mothers away from home, not just in their profound nurturance and love for Ben, but also, in true motherly form, their expectations and commitment to helping him reach his fullest potential.

That’s what he will be leaving.

And that’s why my heart is breaking.

Ben and Niza this week, outside of his cottage.